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I once room mated with a close friend. She was an amazing, intelligent woman who looked out for me and shared her incredible experiences. We were from different backgrounds, but I learned a great deal from her. However, she criticized me and put me down in front of others and NEVER realized her actions. I brought it to her attention many times, and she never acknowledged her wrongdoing or accepted any responsibility. I got my place and did not inform her until a week before I moved out. That was the end of our friendship because she felt I should have handled it differently.
· I blamed her for not understanding the reason I needed to move
· I blamed her for criticizing and displaying my faults continuously
For me to have moved forward, I had to:
· Forgive me for being angry with my friend for not understanding my actions
· Apologize to her (which she never accepted)
· Release all animosity I had towards her
· Appreciate her for all she had done for me
· Remember all the good times we shared
· Take responsibility for my actions
· Stop believing she owed me any understanding with the decisions I made
We do not forgive because we want to play the blame game to make ourselves feel better. We all grow at different stages in life, and we have to take ownership and acknowledge the role we play when giving off negative energy.
We will experience much happiness and growth once we stop seeking others to blame for the negativizes in our lives and forgive by:
· Not believing someone owe you something
· Not expecting others to fulfill a void from within
· Letting resentment and the past go
· Not blaming others
We all are capable of having an abundant mental happy life once we place our focus on:
· Self-love
· The good in our daily lives
· Keeping the mind clear of negative thoughts
· Having a daily plan
· Accepting every day will not be a good day, yet smile and stay grateful
· Not condemning others for not dancing to your music
· Being appreciative
I am appreciative of each of you who support my blog and leave comments and email me.
The Book for this month is Make the Most of You by Patrick Lindsay
As Always, we are stronger together. How will you rise? I am here and listening
As Always, we are stronger together. How will you rise? I am here and listening.
Nice Post!
Good post.
I am learning to forgive and you are absolutely correct on blaming others. Yes, an excuse to not forgive. I will work on. Thanks
This is a hard thing to do. It takes growth to earnestly forgive someone without them acknowledging any wrong doings. And get with within self to understand some expectations we place on them for understanding our actions are unrealistic
Thanks for your comment. The growth begins with you letting go and not expecting anything from the other person. It is up to the other person to acknowledge their wrongdoing and not your responsibility to make them prove anything to you. You are in control of your thoughts, life, and the outcome of your growth. Don’t give that to someone else.