Learning to Deal with Shame, Guilt, and Regret to Move Beyond the Past 

In full disclosure, I am not a doctor, a therapist, giving advice, or associated with any health facility. I am sharing my thoughts. Always consult with your doctor or healthcare provider for any guidance. 

IT IS TIME TO RELEASE THE PAST, EMBRACE THE FUTURE AND ACCEPT WE ARE WORTHY……. 

Philippians 3:12; “but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead.” 

Isaiah 43:18: Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. 

Acknowledging, recognizing, and accepting feelings of shame, guilt, and regret is the beginning stage of learning to release the past because it is beyond our control. We now have the power to grow, develop, and create opportunities to make the most of this moment. 

SHAME – feeling humiliated from a wrong or foolish behavior leading to the feeling of unworthiness. 

GUILT – worry, dissatisfaction from mistakes, unhappiness because of doing something wrong, unfilled promises, or being coerced into feeling guilty.  

REGRET – the feeling of sadness, disappointment over something that has or has not happened, or dissatisfaction with past decisions or actions.  

All three have close meanings. However, through the proper steps, there is potential for growth and room to move towards a healthier mindset.  

There are a variety of reasons why we might experience shame, guilt, and regret. 

1. For instance, saying something hurtful to family and friends intentionally or unintentionally. For example, I communicated to a close friend if she quit complaining about her weight and begin working out, she would feel better. Unfortunately, my timing was off, because she was feeling low at the time.  
2. Striving for unrealistic standards due to social medial influences and struggling to meet those expectations. 
3. Betraying the trust of loved ones. 
4. Forsaking personal values and beliefs and going against your norm. 
5. Measuring oneself to perceived flawless standards set by others.  

Release unrealistic expectations and ideas about others that make us feel inadequate. Instead of imitating someone else’s ideal of perfection, celebrate life as it is, knowing that letting go of such ideals could release our shame and move us to a healthy mental lifestyle.  

1. Imagine snapping a selfie and looking hard at the reflection, staring back. Seize this moment as an opportunity for self-discovery and personal growth.  
2. What thoughts come to mind about the individual you see? 
3. What do you notice in the image staring back? 
4. What is the quiet message you are conveying? 
5. How do you transform all the negative thoughts into positive ones? 

Acknowledge that you are deserving of all by staying CONSISTENT and using the following affirmations: 

• Empower yourself to cultivate and practice self-love,  
• I believe and accept my mind can create new images, 
• I will create positive self-images, 
• I am worthy of love and respect, 
• I am good enough and deserve happiness, 
• I believe in my abilities, 
• I am valued and deserve to be seen and heard, 
• I am connected to my positive surroundings to strengthen my relationships. 

Share this selfie with others, showing off your new self and changes now that you have had time for self-reflection. 

Questions, 

1. What are your desires and ideals? 
2. What are your dreams, hopes, and aspirations? 
3. What are the insecurities you need to work on? 
4. Treat yourself with kindness by speaking nicely of yourself. 

If you find yourself saying negative things about yourself, such as feeling unintelligent, unattractive, or not smart enough, try replacing those with positive affirmations. 

For instance, shift your perspective to ‘ I am competent in many areas, and I am enough as I am. I appreciate my body and am committed to its health and well-being. ‘ Start practicing positive self-talk today and see the difference it makes in your life. 

Accept the fact you deserve to move forward and embrace a fulfilling life without being weighed down by shame or guilt. 

Keeping the Faith in all you do. 

Matthew 17:20 

He said to them, “Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there, and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.” 

Remember, believe and know IT IS TIME TO RELEASE THE PAST, EMBRACE THE FUTURE AND ACCEPT WE ARE WORTHY……. 

Thanks again for tuning in, sharing your thoughts, and reaching out if additional information is needed.